


Pushing By Like Hearts

by mautadite



Category: Steven Universe (Cartoon)
Genre: F/F, Getting Together, Multimedia, Road Trips
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-10-28
Updated: 2016-10-28
Packaged: 2018-08-24 00:39:11
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 13,180
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8349424
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/mautadite/pseuds/mautadite
Summary: “Sounds like you’re really counting on that road trip magic.”(Peridot and Lapis do Midway City, and Empire City, and Plateau Ville, and all the places in between.)





	

**Author's Note:**

  * For [Missy](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Missy/gifts).



> Recip: you had great prompts and love a lot of tropes that I love too. I hope you enjoy this! :)
> 
> Takes place after 4x07, so vague spoilers for everything that precedes that. Title from Sylvia Plath’s _Medusa_ , which has nothing to do with the fic, but it’s a pretty line that I love.

It’s quiet. Lapis spreads her wings, leaps, and flies herself to the top of the silo. Little splashes of water sprinkle over her face, and she’s grateful for the cooling effect, even with the setting sun. In about an hour or so, the melting orange glow will be gone, spread out over the sky and the distant sea, disappearing wispily into the ether. It’s one of those Earth things. Homeworld’s sky never did anything like that.

Peridot is still down in the barn with the others. They’re almost done, so Lapis doesn’t feel bad for leaving them to their own devices for a while. She rarely feels exhausted like she used to, during all those nightmarish days under the sea, but activity and interaction often tire her out far more than she expects. In moments like these, it’s good to be alone for a while.

Ever so faintly, she can make out the sound of Peridot dictating one of her logs. It’s hard not to smile at the sound. Perhaps later, when they’re alone, they can get a head start on those ‘Lil Butler’ tapes that Amethyst had lent them.

For now, she leans back against the cool curved metal of the silo, and watches the stars.

*

_“Log Date, 7-2-2-4._

_“With help from Steven and Amethyst, I think we can safely state that all of our preparations are complete! In two Earth days, Lapis Lazuli and I will be ready to begin our vacation._

_“I have prepared a comprehensive list of places that we are to visit, as well as a plethora of activities that we can partake in once we are there. I was sure to vet most of them with Lapis, so that I’d know in advance whether or not she’d be amenable. But I do have a few surprises up my trouser-legs, ehehe. Ones that she’d like! Steven helped me pick them out! Simply put, this trip is sure to be a tremendous success._

_“All packing has been completed. It is with regret that I noted that we would not be able to take our meep-morps with us. The emotional satisfaction that we would gain from having them nearby is far outweighed by the sheer impracticability of attempting to carry all seven displays with us. On the bright side, we have more than enough room for the ‘harmonica’ and the ‘recorder’, so we’ll have ample opportunity to practice music-making!_

_“In addition, Steven’s Greg—”_

_“My dad, Peridot. Remember when we talked about this?”_

_“Ah. Of course. Steven’s dad who is named Greg helped us acquire a human vehicular construct known as a ‘moped’ that will be the answer to all of our transportation needs! I correctly conjectured that Lapis wouldn’t want to fly us everywhere, as it would be extremely exhausting. In my understanding, vacations are supposed to be relaxing! So instead, we’ll take turns riding this thing, and Lapis can fly us whenever she feels like it. The moped is admittedly primitive in the extreme, but it should get the job done. Pearl has been tutoring us on how to control it and properly ‘fill up on gas’. Pfft, as if we couldn’t handle it. It should be a relatively simple procedure._

_“Lapis is… hm. I’m actually not certain as to her current whereabouts. I guess I’ll find her later. I really wanted to discuss a few more particulars of our trip. We’ve already proven that we make excellent ‘roomies’, I just—”_

_“Sounds like you’re really counting on that road trip magic.”_

_“Huh? Oh, hello Amethyst. I didn’t realise you were still here.”_

_“Oh yeah. I’m just waiting for Steven to finish up. He probably wants to walk back together like some kind of nerd.”_

_“You know you looooove me!”_

_“Whatevs. Yo, P-dot, can I get one of your cans of old paint? My room could use a fresh spill.”_

_“Uh, sure, of course. What was that phenomenon you mentioned?”_

_“Oh, you know, road trip magic.”_

_“…?”_

_“Huh. I’m surprised you haven’t watched enough TV to figure it out. It’s when like, two people go on a trip together, and they’re out on the open road, and everything is possible, and they sleep in motels, and talk to each other about sappy crap, and sight-see, and get closer and junk. And when they get back home, their relaish is like, in a super good place. Road trip magic.”_

_“Hm. I wouldn’t say that’s exactly what I was planning…”_

_“Really. Doncha wanna get clooooooooser to ol’ Lappy?”_

_“…We’ve already erased the line on the floor that partitioned our living spaces, if that’s what you’re referring to.”_

_“Ahahaha! Yep. Yep, that’s exactly what I’m talking about. Oh man. You two are gonna have a lot of fun.”_

_“You know what? We are!”_

*

Peridot has spent quite a lot of time snapping pictures of the moped, trying to get it at exactly the right angle. Steven is the one to finally assure her that all of her shots look good, and then they can finally start loading up the vehicle. 

Greg, Connie, Steven and the Crystal Gems are here to see them off. After all the care and preparation that Peridot had put into packing, it’s pretty simple to get everything onto the vehicle. The trickiest is the tent that Lapis isn’t sure they’ll ever need. Greg ends up strapping it to the back of the moped’s sidecar with something called Velcro.

“Okay guys,” says Greg when they’re almost ready to go. He’s scratching the back of his head and looking around. He eventually finds what he’s seeking in a bag in the back of his own vehicle. “I don’t know if you guys even need this stuff, but I figured I’d get it for the principle of the thing.” He pulls out two sets of rounded headwear, and a few other bits that Lapis can’t identify. They’re all a bright but vaguely scuffed red, like the moped itself. “Protective gear!”

“Safety first!” Steven chimes in, grinning. Lapis smiles back at him.

Greg holds up one of the helmets.

“Lapis, I’m gonna offer this to you first, but I have a feeling I know what you’re going to say…”

Lapis looks at the scuffed headwear. Still smiling, she turns to Greg, and gives him a thumbs-up that she slowly turns upside down. A very convenient thing about human customs and interactions is that you can say a lot by doing very little. 

Greg laughs. “Yeah, I kinda figured! What about you, Peridot?”

Peridot scampers over on all fours and grabs the equipment from Greg’s hands, holding it closely to her face. Today she’s even more excitable than usual; it shows even when she throws critical eyes over the gear.

“Hm. I _would_ like to try more of your human clothing articles…” She blushes right after she makes the confession, as if she hadn’t expected to say it aloud. Greg only grins. 

“Now’s as good a time as any. Whaddaya think?’

Peridot clears her throat. 

“Very rudimentary, though I suppose these polymers and plastics would be sufficient protection for a soft human. Satisfactory design. I suppose these parts are meant to be coverings for the extremities, in case of—ooooh, is that Velcro?!”

It is Velcro. Peridot excitedly scoops up all of the gear, says a hurried thanks, and sits down on the grass to start putting it all on. Lapis chuckles beneath her breath, and walks over to help. Peridot wouldn’t ask her to, but she would _want_ her to, and somehow, this is something that Lapis is now attuned to. Sure enough, Peridot grins at her when she approaches, and starts chattering about the optimal types of adhesive materials. Lapis listens, because that’s something she also enjoys doing, and in the end, Steven is the one to help Peridot figure out which part of the ensemble goes where.

At Steven’s insistence (with the help of a single, starry-eyed look) Lapis fashions a stiff, cold covering for her head using water from her wings. It simulates Peridot’s helmet pretty well, covering her head and ears with its curved, sleek design.

“Now you match!” Connie says, and holds up her device to snap pictures of them.

“Yeah, you _both_ look like nerds,” Amethyst snorts, before being shushed by Pearl.

Peridot goes around saying her goodbyes, while Lapis gets the keys and slides onto the moped. She’s already had some practice with it, roaring around the fields with the flowers and grass tickling her ankles and the wind threading through her hair. For certain, it’s not as fast as flying, and it doesn’t give her that feeling of weightlessness that she clings to whenever she wants to flee. But this trip isn’t about getting away, she supposes. It’s about getting to know the Earth.

Steven’s hugging Peridot and sniffling over her. Peridot is pretending to try to squirm out of it, but Lapis can see where her arms come around and squeeze him probably just as tightly. Next she runs up to talk to Garnet, who stoops to rest a hand on her shoulder and tell her something. Pearl walks closer to them too, and Lapis hears Peridot laugh at something she says. She knows how it happened, Peridot becoming friends with the Crystal Gems, but it still seems so weird. How many little pieces had to align perfectly and in the right order for things to turn out as they had? How many decisions that could have easily gone the other way? Countless ones, she’s sure, and she’s even surer that Peridot wouldn’t have seen this for herself either.

But she’s here – they’re _both_ here – because of what they chose.

Eventually Steven comes over, looking for a hug, and he gets it. She leans down to squeeze him tightly and ruffle his hair, already smiling even before he makes his little joke about naming the moped (‘Lil Lappy 2: the Reckoning’ is his giggling suggestion). And when Peridot hops into the sidecar, he’s there to hug her goodbye one more time. Lapis waves to the gems and the other humans, and then looks down at her friend.

“All set?” she asks, hands on the handlebars.

“Yep!” Peridot says, pointing eagerly towards the horizon and the steadily rising sun. “The open road awaits!” 

“Kinda looks more like a dirt track from my perspective,” Lapis teases. 

“Maybe,” Peridot concedes, blushing but unfazed. “But there’s a bunch of fascinating stuff out there beyond it.”

Lapis starts up the engine, and the sound sends up a ragged cheer from everyone assembled. She can’t help but grin a little.

“Well, let’s go find some of it.”

*

  
  
  
  


*

_“Log Date, 7-2-2-6._

_“Bugs. Earth has… many, many bugs. Possibly more bugs than they have humans, which is a slightly disturbing concept. They seem to be attracted to other lifeforms, whether organic or not, and do not hesitate to accost you, whether you are riding in a slow moving vehicle, or jumping out of said vehicle because the tent fell off the back, or looking around in the grass because you’re sure the extra roll of duct tape fell out of the moped when Lapis was making that one U-turn. THERE ARE SO MANY OF THEM! AND THEY’RE ALL SO TINY!_

_“Ahem. With the help of my tablet and the world wide web, I’ve been able to identify many of the different species that we encountered on our ride to Midway City._

_“Bees. My old nemeses. Did not attempt to sting me, but kept hovering very close by, as if they were thinking about it really hard._

_“Wasps. Like bees, but eviller._

_“Butterflies. They seem attractive and harmless, but their colourful beauty is truly only a distraction from other, more nefarious insects that may be lurking nearby. _

_“Ants. Will not hesitate to walk all over you and be generally creepy and crawly. Did not attempt to get into my pants, despite what the internet has to say._

_“Beetles. I’m also familiar with this variety. Didn’t do much. Just crawled around. These ones aren’t so bad, I guess._

_“Mosquitoes. One of these buzzed near my ear. I asked it to desist. It—”_

_“It was more like you said… ‘GYARH’.”_

_“Ehehehe. Ahem. I um, asked it to desist, possibly through nonconventional means that did not actually involve words. It didn’t desist. It buzzed near me again. It had to die.”_

_“Agreed.”_

_“Other than these nuisances, the trip here was uneventful. Actually, it was pleasant! The places around here are very green, which is a good look on them. Now they are turning brown! Less good, but not their fault, and still appealing in some ways. This planet makes for an interesting study because everything is always changing, and so it mandates much observation and much compilation of results… but well, ehehe. We’re going to be here for a while; we’ve got the time._

_“Greg installed a radio unit into the moped, so we were able to listen to many ‘tunes’ on the ride, which I am told is a mainstay of trips like these. He also lent us some tapes that used to belong to Rose Quartz. Lapis seemed to like those.”_

_“Oh yeah, those were amazing. I really liked Obscure Coffin.”_

_“Weren’t they the ones who just yelled a lot and made waterfall noises?”_

_“Yeah. It was great.”_

_“Well, you can pick the music again tomorrow. Nothing we listened to today really ‘spoke to me’.”_

_“Is music supposed to speak to you?”_

_“I think so. It’s what Steven and Connie said.”_

_“Huh. I guess that’s why most of it has words.”_

_“True enough! Hey, did you want to watch more of ‘L’il Butler’? Steven helped me put the first few seasons and a bunch of ‘Camp Pining Hearts’ on my tablet.”_

_“Sure.”_

_“Okay, let me just finish this up. Hm, what else… We haven’t had to use any of the human currency that Greg gave us yet. We’ve decided to stop for the night in this ‘park’. I don’t think we’ll need the tent tonight, but we should be able to set up pretty quickly if we need to. It kind of reminds me of the barn. Lots of things to swing from and slide on, lots of different colours… not too shabby at all._

_“Lapis says I can take a turn driving tomorrow, hehe. KABLAMO!! This town won’t know what hit it._

_“(Not literally, of course. I didn’t catch everything Pearl said about ‘lawsuits’, but it sounds complicated.)_

_“Peridot out!”_

*

Peridot trots up the stairs of the tall white building, throws her arms open wide and exclaims, “TADA!”

Lapis looks up at the sign, which says ‘Midway City Museum’. 

“Okay,” she says.

Peridot, who had started to dance a little jig on the stair, jostling a couple humans as they passed, goes still and giggles, brushing off her knees. She shuffles back and forth on the concrete in a very different kind of dance. Today the sun is lurking behind a mass of clouds, and the temperature has sunk to what passes for cold on Earth. For a moment, Lapis thinks that that might be the reason for Peridot’s sudden agitation, until she sees her bite her lip.

“Yep, this is it. You uh, you remember this from the list, right? I said we’d go to one of those art houses. But, I mean, we don’t have to if you don’t want to! I mean, this place probably stinks! It’s probably boring! This is _our_ vacation, so you know, you can always tell me whenever—”

“Peridot, Peridot, calm down,” Lapis says, trotting up the stairs, smiling. “If you wanna see it, then I wanna go too.”

Peridot bites her lip, and slows down a little.

“You sure?”

Reaching down, Lapis rubs Peridot’s shoulder. “Really sure. I know you put a lot of thought into all of this. Let’s do it.” 

A blush springs to Peridot’s face, coming to crest on her cheekbones. She stops shuffling, altogether, clasps her hands behind her back, and Lapis can see her fingers twisting together. And then she’s smiling, and it’s a different smile from all her usual ones, because it’s so _bright_ , so purely and simply happy that Lapis is confused for a moment. She still isn’t used to inspiring such an emotion, such an expression in another being. She was never really aware that she _could_. It’s a nerve-wracking power to have, in her estimation. Less than a minute ago, Peridot was nervous and fearful that Lapis didn’t want to do something that she’d planned for them. And now she’s happy, grinning like a star coming to life, creases appearing in her cheeks as she grabs one of Lapis’ hands with both of her own and starts pulling her towards the large glass doors. Lapis did that.

All sorts of funny things are happening in Lapis’ chest, not exactly pleasant but not really unwanted either. Instead of examining them, she hurries along after Peridot, laughing softly.

The museum certainly has a lot to offer. The ceilings are tall and the building feels very spacious, even with all the different people ambling about. Everyone walks very slowly and speaks very softly and looks very thoughtful as they peruse all the different meep-morps. 

(“We’re supposed to call them ‘art’, remember?”

“Nah. We’re rebels. We can do what we want.”

“Heh! I like the cut of your gem. Midway Meep-Morp Museum sounds _way_ better anyway.”)

Peridot immediately drags them towards the largest display in the first room. It’s a drawing of a good-looking human in fancy clothes, sitting in a golden chair. The forest in the background is turning red and gold, like the one Steven had shown her. They study it together for a few moments.

“Says here that it’s called _Contemplative Youth_ ,” says Peridot, squinting at the sign. 

“That’s the best they could come up with? I would have gone with something like, _Annoyed at Whoever the Painter Is and Also There are Leaves_.”

“Whoa…” Peridot slams her fist into her palm gently. “That’s really good!”

The next thing they look at is a statue of a person kicking a ball. One of their fists is raised and the outstretched foot is missing all of its toes. There’s a couple next to them also looking at the statue; the girl is scrolling through her cellular device while the boy opines lengthily.

“…the inherent futility of man and his devices, even in the aftermath of what he would perceive as triumph. And you know, it really underscores the fragility of our place in the world, as…”

Peridot waits until they wander off, the girl nodding absently and blowing a huge pink bubble out of her mouth, before she speaks.

“I kinda thought it looked like he kicked the ball so hard his toes fell off.”

Lapis nods. “I’m gonna called this one _Ouch_.”

A few minutes later, they find themselves looking at a large model living structure made entirely out of colouring utensils for children. Some of them have started to melt, and the wax drips onto the display table and the floor. It’s gross. Lapis kinda likes it.

“Why don’t you give this one a try?” she says, nudging Peridot in the side.

“Sure!” Peridot trots closer. “It’s called _Life in Polychrome_ , but what about uh… what about _Tears of the Cluster and Its Explodey Place of Residence_.” 

“Good one,” Lapis says approvingly, and gives her a thumbs-up. Peridot glows.

They take their time walking about the museum. There are a lot of paintings in the style of the first one; portraits of people staring at nothing, sometimes featuring backgrounds with varying degrees of detail. They’re all mostly boring, but they fix that by coming up with better titles for them. ( _Clods Upon Clods, Yellow Diamond If She Were Smaller and Shaped Like A Woodpecker, Galaxy Warp Mega Kapowie._ )

(They _do_ come across one really good portrait, tucked away in a barely noticeable corner, of a little girl with her finger stuck up her nose. Peridot giggles and snorts so hard, that three different ladies with white hair come to shush them. Peridot seems to find it funnier with every successive shush, and ends up rolling on the floor in a mini-fit of silent laughter. After she’s collected herself, she explains about boogers, word for word as she’d been taught by Amethyst.)

One display involves a person sitting inside a large clock and slowly moving the hands as time passes. According to both Lapis’ reckoning and Peridot’s tablet, the time displayed is blatantly wrong, but the people standing around them seem to think that this is both intentional and meaningful.

Lapis’ favourite morp is one that they come across on the second floor. It’s a simple painting of someone standing on a cliff overlooking the sea, but it’s all constructed out of angled shapes; pentagons, triangles, more than a few squares. Lapis searches for a few minutes, but can’t manage to find a single curved line on the entire canvas. For something so rigidly constructed, it should be angular and ugly, but to Lapis, it is beautiful. She doesn’t find it funny, like a lot of the other stuff in here, but it doesn’t make her bored either. Maybe there’s a name for the space in between those two things, but she can’t think of it.

For a few minutes, she just looks at it, enjoying the way the shapes churn and change in her periphery when she glances at different parts of the canvas. 

Peridot stand silently with her, but Lapis can feel her curiosity slowly getting the better of her. 

“Do you have a new name for this one too?”

Lapis shakes her head, only belatedly realising that she hasn’t looked at the title at all yet. _Airborne_ , the plaque says. The word floats, and then settles squarely in that unnameable place.

“I still need some time to think one up,” she replies after a beat. 

“That’s fine! I can help.”

Prism-like, the painting continues to move without really moving, and Lapis can’t tear her eyes away. It’s a while before she notices that Peridot is sitting at her feet, still as a stone, watching the tableau as intently as she’d ever watch her finger screens or her tablet. Lapis is about to tease her, ask her what happened to the so-called ‘help’ that she’d offered.

But then she sees how Peridot’s brows are scrunched up in concentration, feels the light touch of her shoulder against her leg, sees the smile that breaks apart her lips when she sees Lapis looking at her. A smile that she might have put there herself.

It’s all the help Lapis could ask for, and more.

*

  
  
  


*

_“Log Date, 7-2-2-9._

_“I am EXTREMELY PLEASED to say that Lil Lappy 2 and I have established a special relationship!”_

_“Oh, is that why you don’t call her by her full name?”_

_“You bet! We’ve way passed that stage. Oh my stars, back in Midway I took the controls for a little while, but this was nothing like that! I mean, it was just as amazing, but somehow ten times better!!! I really think my metal powers help out here. I’ve been starting her up like vroom-vroom-VROOM-VROOM!! Turning corners like NYYYYYYYYYOOOOOW!!! Flying past small humans on inferior cycling machines like WHOOSH!!!!!!!!!! Cruising past fields… past fields… like…”_

_“No, no, don’t stop, I wasn’t laughing at you!”_

_“Ehehehe…”_

_“Come on, tell me again what it sounds like when you turn a corner.”_

_“…Nyoooow?”_

_“No, it wasn’t quite that…”_

_“NYYYYYYYYYOOOOOW!!!”_

_“That’s more like it!”_

_“Ehehehehehe… needless to say, I enjoyed myself tremendously. Obviously, the crafts on Homeworld were much more advanced and achieved much, much greater speeds, but as they were all built with the dual purpose of space travel and planet-side travel, they were completely sealed and airtight. This was nothing like travelling on the warship, or the escape pod. It’s not even comparable to practicing with Pearl! You really feel like you’re in control and your body moves with it and it’s really loud and the wind is in your hair and on your skin and you can just… feel so many things at once!”_

_“I don’t think it’s so shabby either.”_

_“Heheh. I guess I must sound kinda silly to you.”_

_“Nah. I’d tell you if you did. I remember the very first time I flew. I was just as excited as you were, maybe even more. I couldn’t stay afloat for long, but I tried really hard to, just to squeeze every extra second out of it. I just knew I wanted to feel that way all the time.”_

_“Yeah! It’s just like…”_

_“Yeah? Just like what?”_

_“Just like, um. Just like driving Lil Lappy 2, of course! Come on, are you ready to try putting up the tent?”_

_“Oh, sure.”_

_“I’ll wait for you by the moped, then!_

_“…_

_“…_

_“…_

_“…‘Just like driving Lil Lappy 2.’ Peridot, you clod.”_

*

“You wanna go up _there_?” Peridot askes, craning her neck and shading her eyes to look at the sky up above. The tower stretches almost beyond sight, but Lapis knows that that’s just an illusion, aided by the mess of clouds crowded across the blue. She tosses Peridot the keys (which she always carries, even when she’s not driving; her metal powers make it easy to hang on to them) and turns back to the vista itself.

“Yep. I want to see if there’s anything interesting at the top.”

“Well, then, of course.” Peridot attaches the ring of keys to something at her waist, and then crawls over on all fours. Lapis smiles. She used to think that that was a sign of nervousness or fear, but it’s just excitement. Peridot has also told her it increases speed and aerodynamics, but she’s not so sure if she believes that one. “If you wanna go, then I wanna go.”

That makes Lapis’ already considerable smile a little larger. She stoops next to Peridot, so that her friend can climb onto her back, and then shoots up towards the sky, wings cutting through the dry autumn air like blades through flower petals. Peridot whoops, and then coughs immediately, gagging and pounding her chest. 

“Careful,” Lapis says, throwing a smiling look back. “The bugs’ll get you up here too.”

“I see,” Peridot says, and coughs some more. Lapis shifts her a little, to make sure that she’s comfortable. She’s just as small as Steven, so it shouldn’t be a problem. She’s also holding onto Lapis’ waist with something like a vice grip, but her hands are warm and steady, so Lapis doesn’t mind too much. She can feel Lapis’ cheek pressing into the skin of her back, close to her gem, but not quite touching it. Mist from her wings must surely be sprinkling all over Peridot’s face and hair, but she doesn’t mention it. The only sound she makes is a quiet sigh as they climb higher and higher into the air.

Lapis takes a moment to observe the tower from a closer vantage point. She’s no expert on Earth’s architecture, but she’s very sure that this is no gem construct. The stone is roughly hewn and inexpertly laid and it is surely younger than even Peridot. 

She sets them down on top of the battlement, stooping gently to allow Peridot to get off. Cracked concrete lies beneath their feet, dusty and barren. The view, by contrast, is a cool, serene one. Miles and miles of countryside surround them, with golden fields and swaying trees, animals flitting in and out of the underbrush, hazy mid-afternoon light streaming through little cracks in the clouds. At the very distant horizon, she can make out the sea, and to the west lie Fairfield and Midway City.

“Where is this place anyway?” she wonders.

“Not sure.” Peridot stands next to her and peers over the edge. “The GPS on my tablet doesn’t work out here. And the map that Connie gave us doesn’t really say anything about it. The tower is marked, but it doesn’t have a name.”

“Hm. Look, see down there, and over there?”

“Ah, yeah.”

“I think those are destroyed dwellings. Humans used to live around there, but they left after something happened.”

It makes Lapis feel solemn, and a little sad. Why, she’s not really sure. It’s not the first time she’s stood in a place where people possibly fought, and possibly died. Even before the colonisation of this planet, gems had fought wars against other species. Remarkably one-sided wars, but casualties on both sides were inevitable. Much of what Lapis remembers from her earlier life is like a lump of coal, waiting to be crystallised, but she knows her history. 

Perhaps it’s remarkable to her because it’s one of the starker examples of the changes that humans undergo. They are so short-lived, it’s hard to imagine them ever leaving a solid impact on the Earth, one that would carry their tale centuries into the future. But here, they had obviously done so. All of the humans are gone, their dwelling places are destroyed, probably along with all traces of their identities. But this tower remains.

She feels Peridot’s eyes upon her.

“Maybe…” she ventures, almost shyly. “Maybe uh, we can ask about this place at the next town. Venture Valley. They might have some stuff to tell us about it.”

“Yeah,” Lapis says softly. She stares at a shell of a house, far down below. “Yeah,” she repeats, firmer this time. “They’re gone but… I guess it couldn’t hurt to know.”

Peridot doesn’t seem to know what to say, so she simply nods. 

Change is a curious thing indeed. It turns the leaves brown and turns the sky black. It turns towns to dust and rubble and endless steppes of green. Change is the only reason she survives to this day; the Lapis Lazuli who came to Earth thousands of years ago could not have dreamt of the hardships and hurdles in her way. That gem would not have imagined how hard she would become.

But change follows change follows change, and ever since being aware that she is capable of it, Lapis can’t help but notice it in herself more and more often. From day to day, there are little earthquakes and tremors surfacing from beneath her skin, and each of them leaves a particular mark. There’s the mark of the Lapis who knows how to laugh again. There’s the specific type of sweetness that only Steven can bring out in her. There’s the Lapis who knows exactly how to make Peridot’s frowny little face bloom into a grin, the Lapis who loves doing that, as much as she’d never say it.

“Uh… sorry.”

Almost startled, Lapis looks down at Peridot.

“What is it?”

“I… I shouldn’t have followed you up here. I mean, I already know. When we’re back home and you fly up to a high place like this, like the silo or the lighthouse, it usually means you wanna be left alone. I’m an idiot, I should have figured it out—”

“No Peridot, don’t say that, I was…” She peters out. _I was just thinking about you?_ It’s the truth, but for some reason the thought of saying it out loud makes her balk, makes her hands prickle with ice. She tries to shake off the feeling like a coat of hoarfrost. “I was… I don’t want to be alone. I wouldn’t have asked you if I did.”

Peridot’s face is very soft in this light. She doesn’t say anything, just twists her lips a little shyly. Lapis wonders about her, in moments like these, where she seems so gentle and unsure. She reckons Peridot has evolved more than she realises too. These were the eyes that Lapis had looked into months ago, in the glowing red light of a Homeworld ship, and realised that she didn’t have it within her to be cold any more.

She stretches out her hand.

“You wanna stay here a little while longer?”

Peridot blushes a deep green, but it only takes her scant seconds to grab the hand offered.

“Sure thing.”

*

  
  
  
  
  


*

_“Log Date, 7-2-3-3._

_“Today was another successful day. The intricacies of human life continue to wonder, fascinate and sometimes disgust us!”_

_“That about sums it up.”_

_“We are currently in the town of Plateau Ville. The citizens are in the midst of celebrating a small local festival. We haven’t been able to work out all the particulars yet, but some of the main components seem to be: cultivating large and extraordinarily shaped tubers, and boasting about who’s got the best one; dunking one’s heads into buckets for sustenance and glory; gathering outdoors in large crowds where loud music is played and lots of dancing occurs.”_

_“Don’t forget all the mouth stuff.”_

_“Oh, right! There is also a contest centred entirely on the consumption of huge baked goods. Whoever eats the most of them gets… ill, I think? That’s the best thing about humans; you never know what kind of wacky stuff they’re gonna get up to next!_

_“It’s been smooth sailing, so to speak, on the road. Sometimes a little bumpy when I’m in control, hehe. We got through a few more of those tapes from Greg, but so far nothing has been able to match the superiority of Obscure Coffin in Lapis’ estimation. We also tried several radio frequencies, with varying degrees of success. If I had to guess, I’d say that humans have recorded songs about every topic available! Heads, hearts, shoes, love, citrus fruits, dancing… it’s a—”_

_“Um… hi, ma’am?”_

_“Oh. Hello… Mary-Anne. Lapis, this is Mary-Anne! I love it when they wear nametags. What can I do you for, Mary-Anne?”_

_“Uh, hey. I’m really sorry to bother you ladies, but my boss is making me. He—”_

_“Making you?”_

_“Yeah. He’s a… he’s a little bit of a jerk.”_

_“I see. Have you ever considered calling him a clod to his face and quitting? It may or may not induce crippling anxiety, but the sheer magnitude of the emotional burden that you shake off is pretty much worth it!!”_

_“Um. That’s not really an option. But I’ll keep it in mind. Anyway, I’m really sorry, but he says that if you don’t order something, you’re going to have to leave.”_

_“…But we did order something. See, right here. We got a durian juice, and one of these… what was this thing called again, Lapis?”_

_“A crap?”_

_“Um, crêpe? That you haven’t eaten at all…”_

_“Something like that. See, we got a juice and a crap. Crêpe. A drink thing and a food thing. And unless I am severely mistaken, we have met all the requirements of coffee shop etiquette. I purchase something, you let me mooch your wifi and charge my tablet. A fair trade.”_

_“I know. But he’s saying that you guys have been here for too long, and you need to order something else. He needs the space.”_

_“We’ve only been here for a half an hour! I can see three other free tables! They’re right there!”_

_“Did I mention that he’s a jerk? He’s been having a bad day that’s lasted a few weeks now. I really am sorry about this…”_

_“Nah, it’s fine, it’s not your fault Mary-Anne. I guess we could get something else…”_

_“Thank you guys for being so cool about this…”_

_“This is unfair. He has to realise this is unfair. Peridot, do you want me to go… talk to him?”_

_“Thaaaaaaaaaaaat probably won’t be necessary. Thanks though.”_

_“…I’m gonna go talk to him. Don’t worry Mary-Anne. You stay here.”_

_“Um…”_

_“Wait. What. Lapis you don’t have to… yaaaaaaargh Peridot out!”_

*

“I wanna go on that one.”

Children are yelling, vendors are calling out to passers-by, screams of fright are seeping from the (supposedly) Haunted House and screams of all kinds are spilling from the rides that seem to climb to the sky. It’s no wonder that Peridot doesn’t hear her at first. The carnival is almost bursting at the seams with humans. It’s jarring, and all the bright colours and strong smells had fairly overwhelmed her at first, but she finds that standing still in the middle of all the chaos makes it easy to centre herself.

Peridot is engrossed in her tablet, fingers flying across the screen, probably finishing up her conversation with Mary-Anne. The waitress had wanted to stay in contact with them, after Lapis had spoken to her boss. Lapis isn’t sure why she was so impressed. It had been simple to inspire him to change his attitude; like most bullies, he was quick to back down when confronted. And subtly threatened. 

She turns on her heel, content to stand back and observe the activities around her while she waits for Peridot. After a few more moments of scrutiny, her eyes wander back to her friend. Peridot has already participated in a few of the games here, and wears the spoils of her victories proudly. There’s a string of shiny beads around her neck, some finger-hats that she’s taken off for now, a regular hat with bits of string trailing to the ground, and a sparkling headband. The headband had come with a twin, which is currently looped a few times around Lapis’ wrist. She still isn’t the fondest of accessories that she doesn’t create herself, but the ecstatic look in Peridot’s eyes when she put it on had endeared her to this piece of fabric. 

“All righty!” Peridot says, finally putting away her tablet. She plants her hands on her hips. “Where to next?”

Lapis smiles.

“I wanna go on that one,” she says again, and points up to the water slide. Its bright yellow sign proclaims that it’s called the SPLASHING SAFARI. It doesn’t look as needlessly complicated as most of the other rides, and its line is nowhere as obnoxiously long. The sound of water had drawn Lapis’ eyes to it, and impulse had made up her mind.

Peridot’s eyes have gone as round and shiny as pearls.

“Really?”

“Yup. Let’s try it.”

Peridot looks like she might start one of those dances again.

“Are you sure?” A quick flash of uncertainty appears in her eyes. “You don’t have to.”

“I know, Peridot,” Lapis says, chuckling. “I don’t do things that I don’t want to do. It’s not really my thing.”

A moment passes in silence before Peridot whoops.

“Well, what are we waiting for!!!”

They do, indeed, have to wait until Peridot races back to the moped to lock away her things. But after that, Peridot grabs her hand and drags her towards the line, and Lapis is laughing too much to protest. Peridot keeps up a steady stream of chatter as they wait in line, making Lapis shake her head and grin in equal measure. When they get to the front, there’s no height requirement, and Peridot whoops loudly again.

Lapis giggles, covering her mouth. It’s proving even better than she thought, indulging in an impulsive thing.

They make the ride down together, Peridot tucked in front of Lapis, water splashing all around them, their screams of laughter mingling with those of everyone else around them. Lapis can’t resist a few tricks, speeding them up and slowing them down, letting the water drench them a few times over, and she laughs even harder at Peridot’s obvious delight.

They hold hands the entire way down.

*

  
  
  
  


*

_“Log Date, 7-2-3-6._

_“Today’s log will document the process of filling Lil Lappy 2 up on gas. This is the first time that we have had to do so on this trip, which marks an admittedly impressive performance for an Earth machine. I suppose she lives up to the ‘hype’, as earthlings would say!_

_“We arrived at the gas station approximately ten minutes ago. They function much as Pearl explained, on a pay-first system. We had to wait a while as there was a rowdy group of adolescent human males in the line ahead of us. It is curious; though the other patrons and the proprietors of this business were considerably older than the boys, they displayed signs of fear and apprehension at their presence. Every time I think I have the hierarchies on this planet figured out, something comes along to trip me up!_

_“Anyway, they weren’t a bother for long. One of them tried to talk to Lapis and she threw a bucket of ice on his head. Not sure where she got it from. I thought they would want to press the issue, and I was MORE than ready to come to her rescue with my metal powers (I’ve been practicing!) but none of them stuck around very long._

_“Right, so the way that refilling works is more or less analogous to—”_

_“Okay, all done.”_

_“Just a second, Lapis, I just want to… wait, you’re done?!”_

_“Yep. You guys were right. It’s pretty easy.”_

_“…Completely done?! Lemme see.”_

_“Okay.”_

_“Wow. You must be a natural at this.”_

_“You know what they say.”_

_“What do they say?”_

_“I dunno. Something, I guess. Come on, let’s go.”_

_“All right! I suppose we can head back to the motel now. ‘Motels’ are a type of lodging that came highly recommended by Greg. He touted the fact that we could ride Lil Lappy 2 right up to the door, which is? Nice? I think? Humans value such strange things. We were finally afforded an opportunity to make use of a motel’s services earlier today. I am happy to report that beds are good for jumping on, and pillows are good for yelling into occasionally. There’s free wifi and Lapis likes the ice machine, and there’s even a radio in the room! We can listen to more music!”_

_“Nice. I found a new Obscure Coffin tape that we haven’t listened to yet.”_

_“Sounds good. Onwards, my friend!”_

*

The road to Empire City was a longer and loopier one as compared to the flight she’d taken with Steven, but they’re finally approaching the big city. According to Peridot’s map, in fact, they’d taken the longest route possible. It was all worth it. In the pitch darkness from miles and miles away, all of its bright lights look like huge stars, coming down to visit the Earth. Somehow, the second time around, the sight means something to her. Especially as she’s looking at it from the ground up, like all the people who live there.

She and Peridot have stopped for the night at an old barn, far outside the city. It’s nothing like their own home, especially on the inside, but was similar enough for Peridot to point it out from the road. They’ve tucked the moped in a little corner, blocked up the door with hay, and settled in.

“Ugh, I’d forgotten about the new guy this season. Go back to Camp Lonely Minds, Gerald, no one cares.”

“Tell me about it.”

Right now, they’re sitting side by side on a bale of hay, rewatching season four of ‘Camp Pining Hearts’ on Peridot’s tablet. She must be doing research for another one of those essays that she likes to write and never show to anyone. Lapis doesn’t mind; she likes watching the show with Peridot, and she likes being able to do it out here, far away from the barn and all the things that had become familiar about Earth. It’s like a small slice of comfort, and Lapis is getting used to allowing herself to have those. To relish in them, even.

Gerald is still whining his heart out on screen, and Patty, for reasons that still aren’t known even in the fifth season, is wilfully putting up with him. Lapis and Peridot roll their eyes in tandem as they draw closer and closer, and finally end up pressing their lips square against one another.

“Great, more kissing,” says Peridot, leaning back with her arms folded. “Just what we needed to see.”

Lapis leans back with her, and she can’t help but agree. There are noises coming from the screen; Lapis knows that kissing is supposed to be appealing, but those sounds don’t really help sell it.

“How did _this_ mouth thing even get started?” she wonders out loud. She feels Peridot shrug next to her. Her friend isn’t looking at the screen; her eyes are fixed on her fingers.

“I’m not sure. I think Steven told me once, or maybe tried to tell me… in any case, it’s one of those touch-based forms of affection that most humans seem to loooooove so much.” She glances up in the quick, nervous way of a small animal; blink, and Lapis would have missed it. “Gross, right? Ahahaha.”

“I guess.” She suddenly feels like she needs to choose her words very carefully, although nothing has changed from the last moment going into this next one. “I mean, it can’t be all _that_ bad, right?”

Peridot’s blush, as usual, springs up very suddenly. There isn’t much light to see by in the barn, save for the light from the tablet and the moonlight filtering through a high window. It’s just enough for Lapis to make out the blotches of dark green.

“Ehehe, you’ve got a point! Maybe it’s just these guys who make it look weird because they’re so boring, am I right?”

“You probably _are_ right.”

They chuckle again, almost in unison, and a little bit of the awkwardness seeps out of the room. The scene switches to Pierre making one of his speeches on the other side of the camp, and Peridot sits up straighter, mouthing the words alongside him under her breath. Even Lapis knows a lot of the words; this season’s B-plot was pretty good.

Soon enough though, the scene switches back to Gerard and Patty glued together, occasionally breaking apart to say something dramatic.

Peridot pulls her knees up to her chest, and drums her fingers on her legs.

“You know, the first time I saw this kissing thing, I thought…” She laughs sheepishly. “I thought they were trying to fuse.”

Lapis considers the notion.

“Well, if humans could do it, it might look something like this,” she says, nodding to the screen. Peridot laughs, and Lapis wonders if it’s her imagination or reality that makes it high-pitched and a little breathless. Her blush has spread all across her cheeks. Waiting for a reply nets nothing; Peridot just stares at her fingers, lacing them around each other. Lapis has lived with and been friends with Peridot long enough to know that it isn’t an angry silence, but her body still feels heavy with the reluctance to break it.

“Have you…” She plays with her skirt; something tells her that she knows the answer to this question, but she’s still compelled to ask it. “Have _you_ ever fused?”

“ME?!” Peridot squawks. She almost falls off of the bale of hay. “No, I, who would I… there’s no one that I could… it’s not as if… _fusion_ is very… very…”

She seems set to go off into a full, flustered ramble, but Lapis senses that this mightn’t be the best time to interrupt her. She hopes that Peridot doesn’t think she’s just teasing her. 

“I…” Peridot bites her lip. “I haven’t. I almost did once, with Garnet, but I got… I backed out. I wasn’t ready.”

Garnet… Lapis had _not_ known that. She isn’t the oldest of the Crystal Gems, but she’s obviously the best suited to teach or give advice to someone who wanted to try. Being who and what she is can’t be easy (even though she makes it look absolutely sublime) and she has doubtlessly learnt a lot from it.

Her hand moves to cup Peridot’s elbow. After a second, she rubs it.

“Peridot… you know that you did the right thing, right? If you weren’t ready, then…”

“Yeah.” She still looks flustered, but calmer. “I’m glad I didn’t do it. I just kinda… wish I was braver.”

She says the last part so lowly Lapis isn’t sure she heard her correctly. It certainly isn’t the most Peridot thing to say, admitting to anything less than constant courage. Lapis squeezes her elbow.

“It’s not just about being brave. It’s about looking after yourself and doing what’s best. I know you. When you fuse for the first time, you’ll want it to be something special.”

Peridot chuckles, tugging on the headband at her wrist. She’s taken to wearing hers as a bracelet too; now they match. The golden stitches in them glint in the shadowy dark.

“Yeah… you’ve got me pegged. Thank you, Lapis.” For a moment, she looks like she might do something with her hands, but then she just drops them back atop her knees before continuing. “And hey… I’m sorry I got us on to topic of fusion in the first place.”

“It’s fine.” She tries to decide how to phrase it. “It’s okay for me to talk about it.”

In this way, at least. It’ll take time, years most likely, before she’s ready to really talk about Malachite, the suffocating nightmare of being her, and the immediate hollowness after separation. All the guilt, anger and hatred that she didn’t know how to manage or where to direct: at Malachite, at Jasper, or at herself.

But the Earth is still teaching her, and change can take time. Eventually, the words will come out.

In the meantime, the show has gone on without them. When she turns back to the screen, Pierre is in a canoe tug-of-war with Briony. The heaviness has gone out of the air, leaving the balmy static that she associates with being with Peridot.

“Do you mind if I rewind a little?” Peridot asks. “I think I missed the second speech.”

“Sure, go ahead.”

Peridot leans forward, and uses her finger to drag the progress bar back at random. When she hits play, they’re both treated to an extreme close-up shot of Gerald desperately trying to Velcro his face to Patty’s. 

They glance at each other at the same time, and let out a long groan of annoyance as one. 

*

  
  
  
  


*

_“Log Date, 7-2-3-8._

_“I have quickly come to the firm conclusion that what I like best about Empire City so far is the clothing. I didn’t know humans could be this… FANCY. Everyone seems to be wearing something that glitters or sparkles or shines. Good for them, really!_

_“Lapis is gone. Just for the morning, I mean! She said she was going to fly across to the shore, and I could tell that she wanted to go alone. The ol’ Peridot intuitiveness at work. I lent her my tablet so that she could take some pictures if she wants to. I hope she wants to. I know that flying and water stuff aren’t the only things she likes (by now, I’m pretty much the leading Lapis expert) but it’s nice to see her doing all that Lazuli stuff again._

_“I hope she comes back soon._

_“I think I’ll try taking Lil Lappy 2 out for a spin around the town! Maybe. Everyone here drives so fast! Not that I couldn’t too, but Lappy isn’t cut out for those kinds of speeds. Although… spending so much time with the machine over the past couple weeks, I’ve come to a deeper understanding of her functions. Really, it shouldn’t be too hard to make some modifications, REALLY push this baby to the limits. Maybe a paint job? I bet Lapis would get a kick out of that. It’d be like… meep-morp in motion!_

_“Hm, what else could I do…? Steven’s last message suggested that I see a film, which is an intriguing thought, but I’d rather do it with Lapis when she gets back. If she wants to!_

_“…_

_“…_

_“…_

_“All RIGHT!! I’ll just… COME OUT AND SAY IT!_

_“I feel WEIRD, and I don’t like it. It is my estimation that HATE would not be too strong of a word. Me and Lapis were GOOD. We were more than good! We were roomies, and friends, and she smiles at me and laughs with me and lets me do stuff for her and does stuff for me. She actually likes me, when I used to think that she never would. Like, here she is, on a cool trip with me! And now when things are going so well, I start having all these weird feelings or… WHATEVER. GREAT TIMING PERIDOT._

_“…_

_“I’m starting to think that Amethyst was right. Or maybe she was wrong. What do I know._

_“I think I’m going to find a pillow and yell into it for a while! Peridot out.”_

*

“Husking? I feel like that has something to do with a vegetable…”

“No no, _busking_! Steven and Greg told me all about it.”

Their hands have been linked for the past fifteen minutes, as Peridot bustles up and down the streets of Empire City. Lapis isn’t sure exactly what Peridot is looking for (“a spot” was all that she would say) but she’s content to hurry along after her. Everyone in this city is always moving; it feels natural, to move alongside them. Of course, this also means that the last four times that Peridot found a place that she thought was optimal, she’s been shooed away by business owners and polite workers, and once, a police officer. 

“And we need our instruments for it?”

“Yep! That, my blue-gemmed friend, is the most important part!”

Lapis half-snorts, half-giggles, and continues to let herself be led around. She’s been getting pretty good with the recorder, so she won’t mind having to use it for whatever Peridot’s got planned for them. Sometimes, on dusky evenings when they don’t feel like watching shows on the tablet or talking or doing anything else, they’ll sit in the moped with the recorder and the harmonica. Lapis takes the main seat and Peridot slips into the sidecar and they’ll try to recreate songs that they heard on the radio, or bang out simple tunes, or just play whatever they feel like. 

Empire City is different from the ground. The sky is so far away and everything seems larger from this perspective. Noise blankets every surface, but so many of them are interesting sounds that she has to tilt her head to identify. And the music… it seems to come from everywhere without ever turning towards cacophony.

Recalling Steven’s proposal of her hypothetical life in this city, she has to smile. From what she’s seen, she doesn’t think she has the temperament for employment in a coffee shop, she’d have no idea how to start tackling this city, and being able to secure living arrangements here seems like a crystal dream. But on the wacky roommate front… she’s covered.

“Okay!” Peridot declares. Lapis looks around to see where she’s led them. They’re near the entrance of one of the less extravagant hotels in town. The sidewalks are large, the foot traffic is considerable, and the hotel’s guard doesn’t object to the fact that they’re within his line of sight. This seems to meet all of Peridot’s requirements.

“So!” she explains as she sets a basket down on the ground in front of them. “The idea behind busking is that you stand in public, play an instrument, ensure that there is receptacle in front of you, and TADA! It is understood that you want money, and people who like your music will give you some! It couldn’t be simpler!”

Peridot is polishing her harmonica on her arm. Lapis accepts the recorder when she hands it over.

“I see. Do we need money right now?”

“Oh, not at all. We still have a bunch of the money that Greg gave us. I just…” Her tone goes soft and hopeful. “I just thought it might be fun?”

Lapis looks at the recorder, then back at Peridot, then back at the recorder, and gives it a little toot.

“Sounds to me like you’re really good at having thoughts. Let’s do it!”

Playing music with Peridot is fun for a lot of reasons, but mostly because Peridot _loves_ it. She’s enthusiastic about a lot of things, and doesn’t shy away from showing it, but when she’s blowing on the harmonica or tinkling the triangle or banging on the drum, her eyes shine brighter than her gem. Knowing that she helps to put that look in her eye… it’s a huge feeling, still fuller than she can describe, but Lapis loves it. 

They get their fifteen minutes of fame (though later, Peridot will insist that it was closer to twenty). Coins of varying sizes and a few stray dollar bills drop down into their basket as they play through every song they know. Which are two. And the second one is honestly just the first one, but louder. When they finish those, they start to improvise, playing whatever they feel like and drawing strange looks from the crowds that trickle past them. Lapis picks out the notes of a song that Steven had once sung to her, and grins at the memory. Maybe this is what people mean when they say music speaks to you. Peridot blows so hard she starts to change colour a little, but she looks happy, and that’s what’s important. 

Her glowing smile is a fixture of the rest of the day, even when the guard finally decides that enough is enough, and comes to shoo them away.

*

*

_“Log Date, 7-2-4-0.”_

  
  
([x](http://k003.kiwi6.com/hotlink/07si0sjan8/Log_Date_7-2-4-0.mp3))

*

Clouds are gathering thickly in the firmament.

They’ve set up the tent near the edge of a little wood. Lil Lappy 2 is leaning against a stout tree with sprawling, twisting roots; the heavy canopy of leaves above should be enough to protect it from the rain that is sure to come. Curled up in the snuggest corner of the tent, Peridot is fiddling with her tape recorder. She’s a little upset; yesterday’s attempt to record her log while Lapis drove them out of the city and towards the great forests had been unsuccessful. Most of her voice had been lost in the howl of the wind and the purr of the engine. It’s a shame, but Lapis doesn’t think it’s so bad. The sound is low and soothing, and telling Peridot as much had made her blush.

“Looks like it’s really gonna come down,” she says now, peering through the tent’s opening. Lapis, sitting near the entrance, nods in agreement. The clouds had started as wispy shapes on the horizon, but as the day wore on and the atmosphere got cooler and darker, they approached with all the calm and intent of a siege-breaking army. 

In a far corner of her mind, half obscured by rubble and fog, there are pleasant memories of the first time she’d felt the rain. Phenomena like it don’t exist on Homeworld; all the water she’d ever known had come from lakes and seas. Standing with her fellow envoys on her first day on Earth, something cold and wet had splashed on her arm. Then another, and another. Gems scrambled to their palanquins and tents for cover, but some of them, like Lapis Lazuli, had remained in the open air. It was the greatest delight to discover that it was water, and that it came from the sky.

It was the last time in a very, very long time that the Earth would provide her with any semblance of contentedness.

The first fat droplets burst from the sky, so heavy and slow that Lapis can almost count the seconds before they hit the ground. The tent is stationed on a carpet of grass, and there’s the forest behind them and an asphalt road not too far ahead of them, and soon, the rain is striking down everywhere with a different pitch and sound for every surface. On the roof of the tent it sounds loudest of all, almost hollow. Peridot stops what she’s doing to look up with a softly rounded mouth.

“Do you think there’ll be thunder?” she asks.

“Could be.” Lapis glances back. “Are you afraid of it?”

Peridot blushes, shaking her head. “I used to be. Not anymore.”

Lapis smiles, nodding. The rain isn’t coming down any harder, but it doesn’t let up; it hurtles down with almost uniform consistency. Tiny gusts of wind sweep into the tent, sprinkling rainwater over her legs, and it’s crisp and cold and amazing.

Without consciously making the decision to do it, Lapis finds herself crawling out of the tent, and into the rain. Like tiny spears, the droplets seem to pierce her skin and hair and clothes, and within seconds, she’s drenched. Laughter bubbling in her throat, she draws the water off of herself, and arcs it up to form a half-bubble over her head. The rain strikes it and rolls off the sides like big fat crystals with the moonlight bouncing off of them, and soon, she resembles one of the fancy chandeliers in Diamond Grove. She laughs again, twirling around in the grass.

Within seconds, she’s aware of Peridot watching her from the tent. She spins, grinning at her friend. No doubt she’s wondering what in the stars above has Lapis acting so strangely. But the thing is, Lapis doesn’t feel like she’s acting in any way out of the ordinary. She feels like herself.

Peridot is watching her with a cocked head and a bitten lip, radiating gentle apprehension. Months ago, Lapis would have never dreamed that she’d think this, but Peridot is really cute when she’s nervous. It’s even nicer when she smiles though, so Lapis hurries to make it so.

“Come on,” she says, stretching out the hand that she isn’t using to hold up her shelter. “I’ll feel silly if you leave me out here on my own.”

She gets the smile that she was after, but Peridot is still looking up at the sky dubiously. She sticks her hand outside and gathers up a palmful of water. Yards away, Lapis can see her tiny shiver.

“Cold,” she comments. 

Lapis trails closer.

“I guess it is,” she says. “How about this?” She flicks a few droplets at Peridot’s face.

“Hey!” Peridot gasps.

“Or this?” She flicks a few more.

Peridot sputters, but there’s a light in her eyes and her grin covers her entire face. She cups her hand in the rain and flings the water in a little arc at Lapis, who giggles and leaps back. When she next looks, Peridot is scampering out of the tent.

The sound of the rain soon has their laughter as an accompaniment. Peridot bats rain at her, waving both hands furiously, sometimes kicking up droplets from the grass. Lapis doesn’t bother trying to block them, and soon gives up her shelter in favour of using both hands to sprinkle water back at her friend. When Peridot runs backwards, sticking out her tongue, Lapis plucks moisture right out of the sky to form a willowy ring around them, blocking off her escape. Undeterred, Peridot chops the ring with the flat of her hand, yelling in triumph when it breaks. But by that time, Lapis has already sidled up to her, and surprises her with a watery crown, perched atop her head for a few seconds before it bursts. Peridot shrieks, and launches at her. 

Somehow, they end up hand in hand, dancing around with the grass tickling their ankles as the rain comes down around them. Lapis has never heard Peridot laugh this much, this freely, this giddily, and the sound entrances her. Her hair is soaked, and flops over onto her visor, changing the shape of her face. Lapis strokes it back with her fingers, and Peridot blushes, and they twirl and dance and dance until they collapse.

Breathlessness isn’t something that gems experience, but Lapis is sure that this is as close as it gets. They shuffle back inside with the rain still beating on their backs, all the while giggling faintly.

Peridot removes her visor, and wipes her face.

“That,” she declares, “was fun.” She still looks half bewildered; at herself, at Lapis, at them both, but that doesn’t deter her smile.

“Happy to help,” Lapis says.

They sit next to each other, legs pulled up to their chests. Lapis extends her hand and carefully siphons the rainwater off of Peridot, and ejects it from the tent in small globules. She receives a murmured ‘thank you’ in return. When she’s done, she does the same for herself as Peridot watches, making little water stars and shapes for their amusement before letting them float out into the rain.

When Peridot next comments that it's cold, Lapis puts an arm around her. They linger together at the tent's entrance, watching the rain come down.

*

  
  
  


*

_“Log Date, 7-2-4-3._

_“Three notable things happened today!_

_“One: We were pursued by the lawmakers of this town. I can now say that I’m a wanted gem on TWO planets! That is, of course, without counting Homeworld’s network of colonies. My notoriety is sure to bring more predicaments, but I’ll make sure they don’t get to you Lapis!”_

_“Thank you. I’m not really sure that we’re actually in trouble though.”_

_“Maybe, maybe not. Here’s how it all went down. The two police officers stopped us after they thought they saw Lapis without a helmet on. After they realised that she WAS wearing one, and had indeed been wearing it all along, they were prepared to go. Then… one of them asked Lapis to see… her LICENCE! She replied that she didn’t have one. He then asked ME to see my licence. I said—”_

_“‘You’ll never take me alive!!!’“_

_“Something like that. Then the second officer said, ‘You know, I don’t think you actually need a licence to ride one of these things.’ Then the first one said, ‘I’m pretty sure you do, Craig.’ Then the second one said, ‘I’m pretty sure you don’t, Ben.’ Then the first one said, ‘Well, I guess you’d know.’ And then they left._

_“So… close one!! I’ll be keeping an eye out for them.”_

_“I guess it won’t hurt.”_

_“Two: We saw a movie! We were told that the ‘theatre’ in this town is very dated, and so only old movies were available to watch, but it was all the same to us. We saw ‘Dogcopter 1: Dog Days of Summer’, on both Steven and Mary-Anne’s recommendation. The screen was quite large, almost rivalling the size of the communicator screens on Homeworld, but those are never used for entertainment. What did you think of the movie, Lapis?”_

_“I give it a six.”_

_“Same. It’s no ‘Camp Pining Hearts’; not enough time was spent on the relationship between Jenny and Dogcopter, there was little emotional depth and they didn’t really sell me on the villain. But all the action and blowing up and aerial firefights were PRETTY COOL!_

_“And three: we went to another museum!”_

_“A wax museum. Eugh.”_

_“That is an extremely accurate summation of my thoughts. The purpose of wax museums is to create hyper-realistic facsimiles of famous people and historical personages in wax, in order to… creep out the patrons?! Every time I think I understand humans… KAPOW. They blindside me with something like this.”_

_“It could have been worse. At least we didn’t know any of those people. Imagine a life-sized wax statue of Yellow Diamond.”_

_“…Eugh.”_

_“That’s what I’m saying.”_

_“Aaaaaaaaaaand on that pleasant note, we better get going. We’re going to have to drive all night to get to Hill Town in time! And we might want to fill up on gas, just in case. So…_

_“…Hey, do you wanna do it?”_

_“Do… oh. Sure, why not?”_

_“Ehehe, here you go. You just talk right into there.”_

_“Okay. Ahem. Peridot and Lapis, out.”_

*

The fireworks go on for almost an hour. Most of the little town is gathered at the top of the hill to watch them, and Peridot and Lapis are among them, sitting on the grass near the back. They’d both been rooted to the spot, watching. Displays like this would be child’s play for gemkind, but it’s simply not done. On Homeworld, when something is made for beauty and the pleasure of being looked at, it’s often another gem.

Peridot is leaning back on her palms, watching the bright lights burst and fizzle out in the dark sky. Her harmonica and the keys to Lil Lappy 2 are sitting in the grass next to her, as well as a few food items that she had been determined to try, but soon gave up on. Their little map isn’t far away either, and Lapis can see amidst all the curving arrows and annotations and dates that this is their last town. They’ll be headed back to the barn within days.

About a half an hour ago, Lapis made up her mind to do it. Ask her. How to go about it, she’s not sure; she figures she can just make things up on the go. A knot of apprehension has formed in her chest and remains lodged there like a sword in a stone, but somehow it makes her feel buoyant. She almost likes being nervous about this. She likes knowing that she cares, that it matters to her. Peridot matters to her in ways that she never would have dreamed.

Peridot sits up, and stretches.

“I guess we should head back soon. Did you uh… did you enjoy the fireworks?” she adds casually, picking her teeth. 

“Yeah,” Lapis says simply. “They were really nice. Thank you for bringing me here.”

“Well… good! I’ll be honest, Steven was the one to tell me about this place and this event; he told me you’d like it. Though I’m not sure about the name. It isn’t quite fire, and there’s not much work involved in it, is there?”

“Sounds like someone might have to come up with a different name, then.”

Peridot snickers, covering her mouth with her hand.

“I’ll do my utmost best to get ‘explosion-fun’ to catch on, then!”

Lapis snorts, giggling into her arm. All the while her eyes are on her friend. Moonlight is painting her like a pearl, the colour is rising high in her cheeks, and she looks so happy. It’s like the stars are shifting. Lapis looks at her, and figures that there’ll never be a better time than now.

“Hey Peridot?”

“Yeah?” 

“Can I… can I do the mouth thing?”

“Oh yeah, sure.”

It’s a quicker answer than Lapis had expected. The stone in her chest leaps up to her throat, and she shuffles closer, determined not to back out now. Peridot is rummaging amidst the items next to her, but stops and turns when she feels Lapis’ hand on her arm. Lapis breathes slowly, gazing at Peridot right into her shining green eyes. Cupping the side of her face, (she feels a gasp, the smallest intake of breath) she leans down and presses their lips together.

For several moments, everything begins and ends here. She’s sitting on a grassy hill far from every home she’s ever known, the scent of flint tickling her nose, her mouth pressed to the mouth of the sweetest, funniest, most genuine gem that Homeworld has ever produced. Peridot is completely still except for the faint tremble in her arm. To Lapis, it feels seismic. Her eyes are closed, and everything about her body in this moment screams weightlessness, and if she were to start floating away, she wouldn’t be the least bit surprised.

She pulls back eventually, lashes fluttering, and observes her friend. Peridot’s eyes have gone as wide as little moons, and Lapis can swear that she sees constellations in them.

“Road trip magic,” she says in a hoarse, fluttery whisper.

Lapis blinks down at her, brows furrowed.

“I… what?” says Lapis.

“Uh… nothing, nothing!” Peridot says after a heartbeat. If her cheeks were burning before, they’re positively aflame now. Lapis looks at where her right hand is, amidst all the food items, and it suddenly dawns on her.

“You thought I was asking…”

“To try this eating thing, yeah.”

It’s Lapis’ turn to blush; she clutches a hand to the front of her dress as the mortification rises in her head like smoke.

“Oh Peridot, I’m so _sorry_ …”

“WHAT?? Nononono, don’t apologise!” Peridot grabs her hand with both of hers. There’s a touch of desperation in her voice. “You don’t have anything to be sorry for! Trust me! As someone who’s had to give out a bunch of apologies! This is definitely not an apology type situation.”

Lapis looks down at their linked hands. They’ve held hands a fair few times, during this trip and before it, but now, she sees a world of change in their linked fingers, the thumb that Peridot brushes across her knuckles, the headband turned bracelet that hangs slack on both their wrists. Looking up, she feels her hope coming back to her.

“Then what kind of situation is it?” she asks, lips twitching.

“A really, _really_ good one,” Peridot says earnestly. It’s as if there’s a permanent blush painted on her cheeks, and it’s incredibly charming. “Let’s just say that on a scale from not happy to ten I am on a number that if translated into speed would break the Earth’s sound barrier.”

Lapis laughs delightedly. “That’s _pretty_ happy.”

“Pretty doesn’t begin to cover it. Unless, you know, we’re talking about you.”

Lapis stares at her for a second, and then giggle-snorts so hard she almost jostles their hands apart. Peridot looks sheepish, but also quite proud of herself, and Lapis is so very fond of her.

“You’re sweet. So I guess it’s safe to say that you were… okay with that?”

“You’d only be safer with the protection of ten Class-5 battleships,” Peridot assures her. “I’m really glad that you did… you know, what you did. That you asked. I would have never been brave enough to…”

Shaking her head, Lapis shushes her gently.

“Hey, what did I tell you? It’s not about being brave.”

Peridot bites her lip and nods. Up above, one last display is being set off: a brilliant work of fiery oranges and bold reds that Lapis can see in her periphery. Neither of them looks at it head on. Lapis is staring at Peridot and Peridot is looking at their hands.

“Can I… can we…” Peridot starts.

“Yes,” says Lapis almost immediately, and that’s all it takes for Peridot to launch into her arms, knocking her back onto the grass. For the next few minutes, they vacillate between giggling and kissing and making sure they’re always holding hands and then kissing some more for good measure. When they break apart, Peridot rolls onto her back, kicks her legs up and down, and screams shortly into her hands. Lapis leans on her elbow to watch her.

“Sorry,” she says when she drags her hands away. “Just had to get that out.”

“No apologies, remember?” says Lapis, brimming with amusement.

“No apologies,” Peridot repeats, like she’s trying to remind herself. Lapis helps pull Peridot back into a sitting position, and smiles when her friend links their arms and tucks into her side. It’s a good mantra. They’ll have a lot to talk about and a long way to go, and there are worse ways to start than with an unwavering acceptance of self.

*

  
  
  


*

_“Log Date, 7-2-4-5._

_“All right, what’s first… tent?”_

_“Check.”_

_“Instruments?”_

_“Check.”_

_“Clothes?”_

_“Check.”_

_“Spoils of carnival war?”_

_“Check.”_

_“Music tapes?”_

_“Check.”_

_“Keys?”_

_“You’ve got those.”_

_“Oh, right. Uh, let’s see… got ‘em! Check. Souvenirs?”_

_“Check. Do we really need all those glass things with white dust and all the wobbly big-headed things?”_

_“Yep! According to what I could dig up, they’re the traditional gifts given to friends after returning from a trip such as this one.”_

_“The kind of trip where you rename art, and learn to busk, and find out that kissing is a lot better than it seems on TV?”_

_“Exactly that kind of trip.”_

_“Good to know!”_

_“Ehehehehe… but hey, Lapis… I did want to know, seriously… did you like it? Was it okay? I know on one hand some things didn’t go as we expected, and on the other hand, some things turned out way better than we’d ever hoped. But in a general way… if you had to rate it or classify it, was it… was it a good vacation?”_

_“It was. I mean that. I’d tell you if it was otherwise. Months ago, I told Steven I wanted to see more of the Earth, and I did that. It was only a pretty small part of it, but we saw so much, it felt like a completely different world. And I had a great time in all those places, but the truth is, I think I would have loved most places I went, granted I was with you.”_

_“…!”_

_“Oof! …Ahaha, all right, all right. Come on, let’s finish this.”_

_“You got it.”_

*

The sky is doing one of those things again. One of those strange, beautiful, alien things that only Earth’s sky does. There’s a blanket of stars knitted into it, and each one shines like the gasp of a living gem.

They’ve been back for several hours now; friends have been greeted, gifts have been given, stories have been told. It hadn’t taken long for Lapis to grow tired, and as always, she finds herself at the top of the silo, alone. The barn had been a most welcome sight after three weeks away from it. Everything was in its perfect place; the demolished bicycle outside, the little lake, all their meep-morps. It was slightly jarring, in fact, to come back and find everything so static when so much had changed between them since they’d last walked these floors. 

It only gave her pause for a moment, though. This is their home. They can make it change with them.

She can hear Peridot’s voice like a bugle horn, saying goodbye to the Crystal Gems and Greg, and when she shifts, she can see her too, hopping up and down on the spot as she waves. The van rumbles off; she thinks that she sees Amethyst’s long arm wiggling out of the window to say goodbye to her, so she waves back. The van leaves a faint tail of smoke that vanishes as it rises steadily into the air.

Lapis hugs herself about the waist, wind jostling her hair, and looks out across the fields. It’s hard to see in the darkness of a night like this, but they’re coming over with flowers; hardy little yellow and white things. More signs of autumn, Steven tells her; flowers that are considered weeds by most, but continue to crop up year after year. Lapis embraces them wholeheartedly. Behind her, she can hear the patter of little footsteps climbing up the stairs to the silo. Otherwise, it’s quiet.

Peridot slips up beside her, tablet in hand, and links their arms even before she sits down. Lapis leans across to receive a quick kiss on the cheek, and then they sit back together, hand in hand, to look up at the stars.

*


End file.
